There is a moment of profoundness in the movie "Lilo and Stitch." Stitch is a psychotic alien who is mistaken as dog by Lilo who adopts him, and cares for him. In return Stitch nearly ruins Lilo's life. You can't blame him really, he is only doing what he knows to do. So anyway the point I'm getting to is Stitch is on stuck here on earth, abandoned by the universe. He is surrounded by a human family that inexplicably love him without condition, a concept that is as alien to him as he is to them. There is a book that Lilo had read him him about a little lost duck. One night he goes outside and looks up at the sky and like the little duck cries upward "I'm lost."
I feel like that a lot of the time. I am surrounded by people and things but I feel so alone, and not just alone but lost as well. To be lost suggest that I used to belong. Somehow I have gotten dislodged from that place and have ended up on my own. Everything reminds me that I'm strange, that I don't match up. Even the people around me that are kind and try to help baffle me. Maybe for me, like it was for Stitch, a sense of belonging will come after hard work and sacrifice. I just wish life could be wrapped up as easily as it is in a Disney cartoon.
About Me
- something more than ordinary
- "Could it be that this misery will suffice?" -City and Colour, Sleeping Sickness
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12 years ago
3 comments:
While I've never seen that movie, I know exactly how you feel with the exception that I've never really felt like I belonged. Even as a kid I distanced myself from my family.
I feel alone pretty much all the time. Even with I'm with a group of friends who love me dearly and accept me even though I am riddled with faults and attempt to push them a way more than once. I don't know if this has anything to do with having a mental illness but... I don't know. I think part of us is aware that something in our brains is different. That we don't see the world like most people.
As for life wrapping up like a disney cartoon... they only show a glimpse of a life. There is no such thing as happy ever after, there is only trying ever after. Happiness is rarely always present in one's life but in a way that's good because when it's there you treasure it. We love happy endings because we know that they don't exist in life. But, what do exist are happy beginnings. So instead of looking for an ending, look for a beginning.
I dunno, just my thoughts. *hug*
Thanks for that. I know that life isn't like Disney movies. It's just that sometimes I wish it was. The good guys always end up with the happy ever after endings. So you have to believe that they never have to worry about anything for the rest of their lives. While that may not be realistic I can't help but wish for it.
Feeling lost and alone is something I have battled with all my life long. I have often felt alien even when surrounded by people. I feel separate, apart somehow. Outside of some club, with no idea how to get in. It is weird. I'm finding within this small blogging gang of us, which I suspect is bigger than we know, it is a common feeling. And also proof that we are not alone, not so apart. Not so lost. We have each other; different cookies, but cut from the same cookie dough. (with nuts, of course)
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